this is 2008

Life is like having on your hands on many separate blackjack games simultaneously.

We withdraw from some tables and get involved with new ones. Like how we went from full-time student to full-time employee. The last set of card dealt from the game of school resulted in a paper certificate and a commencement ceremony of a whole new card game called career. Ambition is like the first set of unopened cards, where things are still fluid and uncertain - place for hope. For those like me who don’t know what to expect, we only hope to win. With the chances of a sure win scarce, we can only try to fight for the optimal. Still, we win some we lose some.

And in the table of family and friendships, we gave some a hard time and vice versa. Yet they sat alongside as we all battle against this necessary game of life. But some withdrew from our game so unexpectedly and didn’t give us a chance to recoup our losses.

I guess this is how I can best sum it up. Life - something you can never reconcile your winnings or losses, measure your happiness and unhappiness. I won this much, I lost this much. I am this happy and this sad.

Christmas 2008

态度

我们对生命要抱着什么样的态度？

生命，那是自然会给人类去雕琢的宝石。 ——诺贝尔

这是一个让我感受到亲情，友情，爱情和团队精神的篮球纪录片。

a raving pink rock christmas

14th Dec 2008 at Peishan's.
rockclimbing??
now we rock to guitar hero instead.

drink drank drunk.

SURVIVOR - PM

the tribe is voting

九降风

这是一个值得推崇的好片 - 九降风

typeracer

the geek in you challenges you to compete in a typing race.

and the geek in me feels addicted.

back from desaru

never expected that a company's event can be sooooooo crazy. i feel that i have just turned 18 and went clubbing for the first time. wait, i didnt even go clubbing when i was 18.

Happiness is infectious

Using statistical analysis the researchers measured how social networks were correlated with reported happiness. They found that live-in partners who become happy increase the likelihood of their partner being happy by 8%, similar effects were seen for siblings who live close by (14%) and neighbours (34%). Work colleagues did not affect happiness levels suggesting that social context may curtail the spread of emotional states.

Interestingly, it is not only immediate social ties that have an impact on happiness levels, the relationship between people's happiness can extend up to three degrees of separation (to the friend of one's friends' friend). Indeed, people who are surrounded by happy people are likely to become happy in the future.

....read here

hah. this explains MANY things.

懒

黄靖伦 - 懒
作词：管启源
作曲：伍家辉
专辑：伦语录

我们都有不可告人的寂寞
我们都假装着健康的生活
早睡早起 不要想得太多
日子就这样过
我们都有一些感情没有结果
我们的故事对朋友说了又说
说太多
懒得去想 懒得去管
懒得快乐 懒得悲伤 懒得堕落
把所有问题抛在角落
不清不楚不过问 甚麽收获
懒得去爱 懒得去恨
懒得回忆 懒得遗憾 懒得迷惑
继续 假装努力 的生活
离开你以後的我 日子一天一天过
还没有习惯寂寞 每晚下班了以後
一个人到处乱走 开车在城里兜风
碰到思念的路口 转左还是右
离开你以後的我 应该比从前自由
不再属於谁的我 重复生活的动作
早午晚餐与工作 分不清周日周末
常常还会想起你 有没有想我

old friend.

"it takes time to grow old friends"

...(sign spotted at foodcourt @ anchorpoint) how very true.

balance.

to take my mind of this necessary evil in life called work, let me channel my energy to play.

14th Dec: Climb Team Gathering
20th Dec: F.M's Christmas Party
21st Dec: AHSCDS Christmas BBQ

and then finally we save up for goodwoodpark to kick off 2009.

fill up the rest of the empty slots. friends are running off with other halves and have stopped asking me out. the audacity!

when mayday turns x-japan

woo!

该这么过才算不挥霍人生呢？

charge it.

"we are all dispensable. expandable"

yup, that's the word. dispensable. expandable.

misery loves company

it has been such a bad week.

maybe thats why we have a vent & rant hole - whats worse than the bad day itself is when there's no time to bitch and no one to bitch to.

year-end

now that we are in the midst of planning the parties/gatherings, december is indeed nearing.

its going to be a busy busy month for both work & play!

it's obvious

why they are my favourite band. they are everything i want to be.

生存以上，生活以下

連刷牙 也照著節奏 沖了馬桶 洗了臉上的疲憊泡沫
沒有夢 昨夜沒有夢 鏡子裡的 陌生人已經不再做夢
上課鐘 變成打卡鐘 單行道般 的人生流失在車陣中
進行曲 規律的平庸 活的像是 一句標語押韻而服從

午餐是 隨便還是 都好還是 跟你一樣 的任何一種
奇怪呢 很久以前 我是很有 想法主見 心跳很執著
傷心再也不吹風 現在只害怕傷風 耽誤了誰和誰的要求
一天一天看日昇日落 看月圓月缺 年復一年的經過 看誰把我變成現在的我
怕潮起潮落 怕患得患失 錯了又錯的疼痛 終於我的生命只剩生存
活著只會呼吸吃飯喝水的生活

小時候 只要看天空 枕著白雲 就覺得全世界都擁有
長大了 擁有的更多 為何感覺 到越來越匱乏越貧窮
那一年 只追逐自由 現在只能 追逐著漲不停的石油
是不是 地殼又震動 要從家裡 震落才悔恨這樣生活

生活的 反面會是 死去還是 這般生存 不再有衝動
閉上眼 就能感覺 生命正在 一分一秒 飛奔遠離我

還不如一隻昆蟲 至少能破繭展翅 飛像那被奪走的天空
一天一天看日昇日落 看月圓月缺 年復一年的經過 看誰把我變成現在的我
怕潮起潮落 怕患得患失 錯了又錯的疼痛 終於我的生命只剩生存
活著只會呼吸吃飯喝水的生活

一年有 三百六十 五個日子 五十二萬 五千多分鐘
一生有 三十四億 五千六百 七十八萬 九千下脈搏

為愛而生之後 生命要怎麼揮霍 直到我化成煙的時候 一天一天
看日昇日落 看月圓月缺 年復一年的經過 看誰把我變成現在的我
怕潮起潮落 怕患得患失 錯了又錯的疼痛 終於我的生命只剩生存
活著只會呼吸吃飯喝水的生活

連刷牙 也照著節奏 然後設定了明天 六點半的鬧鐘

......五月天 - 生存以上，生活以下 (後青春期的詩 )

tagged by the most unlikely person

People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any questions that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

Tag five people to do this quiz; those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who tagged them and are disallowed from tagging the person by whom they were tagged.

Do you have secrets?

不能说。

Would you fall in love with a younger male/female?

market expansion is inevitable - the pool is getting smaller.

Do you enjoy going to school?

i enjoy the fun parts of it.

What would you do with a billion dollars?

travel the world. and think of some ways to multiply the money and making it sustainable.

Would you love your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend again?
my current state of mind says no.

Which is more blessed - loving or being loved?
loved. unless it makes me cringe.

List out your 15 favourite songs.
this is tough. 15 singers/band would be much easier. ok these are the song i would not press the skip button on.

1. 五月天-拥抱
2. Toploader - Dancing in the moonlight
3. 杜德伟-天真
4. Lily Allen - LDN
5. Aozorafantasii - Replay (english ver)
6. Feist - Mushaboom
7. E17 - Each time (totally cheesy one from secondary school days but it just got stuck ok)
8. 蘇打綠 - 小情歌
9. 蘇打綠 - 蓝眼睛
10. 方大同- 歌手与模特儿
11. 方大同 - 每天每天
12. 盧廣仲 - 100 种生活
13. Bic Runga - Sway
14. 范伟琪- 我们的纪念日
15. 周杰伦-简单爱

though if we were to stick strictly to the term favourite, it will just boil down to the first 3.

If you are single and your crush is attached, what would you do?

what's there to do???

Is there anything that has made you extremely happy?
dreaming up extremely happy scenarios.

What makes you angry?
insensibility. people with no sense of guilt, responsibility whatsoever.

How would you see yourself in 10 years?

this is my most hated interview question. in an interview i would probably cook up some politically correct answer but the truth is i dont know and i dont think that far.

Currently, who are the most important people to you?

family.

What is the most important thing in life?

love.

If you could ask God just one question?
even though there are all these biblical answers and logical reasoning to why disaster, misery and misfortune happen... but i just cant seem to accept there. why God? why? its a question where there is never an answer I am happy nor can reconcile with.

What is your favourite colour?

i hate choosing. i dont have a single 1 favourite.

Would you give your all in a relationship?

im sure there's always something to hold back.

What would be the first thing you say/shout when you reach the peak of Mount Everest?

whoa?

What are you doing now?

wondering why i am spending so much time on a tag! i think its been at least 30 mins already, why am i taking it so seriously? i actually ran through my music list to churn out those 15 songs.

Do you prefer coffee or chocolate drinks?

chocolate.

Tag five people.

hah. revenge time!
maggie, yieng, drey, yx, lip.

the power of kuchimomo

i am in shock

it was just last week when apple was boasting over dinner on how he led a trend of carrying the platypus water bottle. wz & i reminded him that it had a following of barely 5 people max. on the other hand, kuchimomo is known as a result of frequent usage from SMU to NUS and NTU. at least on my part, i have beckoned the climbteam, ahscds, hr clique to jump into this kuchimomo bandwagon.

in all randomness, i googled 'kuchimomo' today. and results returned to show feifei & my blog (not surprisingly) but there's also this other NUS girl's blog. and in her blog entry, it was even explained in brackets that kuchimomo refers to hanky-panky. the last i checked, i dont know her nor recognize her as part of F.M friends.

has kuchimomo really caught on??

p/s: kuchimomo is also found to be a registered username.

blessing

it is a blessing to have a big rowdy extended family.

crack me up

as much as i may complain about working life, you wont catch me saying that i miss school. because i really dont ... if by school you mean projects, irresponsible groupmates, mugging, tests, exams, presentation. throws me back when people say they miss studying, because I certainly do not, at all ever want to touch any textbooks again.

but, i miss having my friends around me. and that in between the horror stories of school, there were pockets of fun. that we could play truant, have lunch/dinner/supper together, have beer, bitch, share youtube videos, crack jokes at each other. and there was laughter in my life everyday - loud unpretentious laughter with snorting in between, until we couldn't breathe talk, until our stomachs hurt until we cry.

and now we work to silence, work related questions, dry laughs if any. no jokes are cracked because there's nothing to make fun of and neither would the colleagues find it funny.

i miss such a simple thing known as laughter.

room for rent.

well i do suppose i got what i wished for, happy long weekend!

after a saturday of frolicking around - from interview to picnic to flea to chinatown to guitar hero, i spent the rest of the long weekend at home sniffling and coughing incessantly.

at least i managed to have my movie marathon. its been a long while since i did that so much so that i thought i walked into the wrong shop yesterday because my absolutely favouritest, cheapest ever rental store expanded and i didnt even know.

nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

if things could go my way, i'd wake up to another weekend.

12.56 a.m, what?! its monday already!

the one about breakfast and starvation

this group of people named 'us' never fails to amuse.

j: i will be seeing del and man for breakfast on that day. woah too much love for the day man!

e: oh wow, i didnt know we have breakfast ppl in our group. besides gan ann i think, i thought she's the only one who wakes up early.

j: yea i didnt know we had breakfast ppl in our group either.
working life sure has changed us huh. any grasp for a tidbit of social life.

f: eh. i also eat bfast now loh!

g: eh, y u all have breafast never invite me?
jan, since u have car, shld come pick all of us up for breafast. hehe.
life is good today cos im on mc, but then have tonnes of work so doing some now...
since we r all so starved of love, y cant we just meet for breakfast tmr?

summary: we want love and a tidbit of social life so we want breakfast.

whoa. analytical skills.

see no evil.

this is one of 'em days where i dont feel like facing the world. i stepped out of my house wishing that singapore had the lifestyle / culture of donning mouth masks like taiwan & japan. it's sure one of those days where i want one on without people giving weird looks or inching away for fear that they might contract SARS.

oh gosh, the agony of human contact.

秘密

秘密-張震嶽

作詞：張震嶽 作曲：張震嶽

總在閉上雙眼之後 才能看見妳
這是一個心中秘密 偷偷在愛妳
妳卻不知道 有人在想妳

總在黎明來臨之前 我還是清醒
什麼時候我才可以進入妳的心
好想對妳說 我正在想妳

也許在妳的心中早就已經有人進去
或許妳不曾接受真正的愛真誠的情
遺忘吧過去的事 不要 再 懷疑
我彷彿可以聽見妳的心跳妳的聲音
不要只有在夢中才能看妳才能靠近
我可以慢慢的等 直到 妳 離去

huff puff.

saludos.

i guess that's about all i can get out of myself. im barely keeping my head above the water at work with all that issues that keep coming up. work is just work right. but why do i feel so emotionally drained.

恋空

恋空

vicky cristina barcelona

i like the way the movie ended, how everything went back to square 1. that's how life is, at some point you think you are going to get something out of it but in the end you realize, you emerge none the wiser.

Narrator: [voiceover] Vicky returned home to have her grand wedding to Doug. To the house they finally decided to settle in. And to lead the life she envisioned for herself before that summer in Barcelona. Cristina continued searching... certain only, of what she didn't want.

now, besides wanting to go to spain, the idea of living there is tempting.

humiliated.

"bad day for Ferrari huh? Well, i can't say i'm unhappy... im a McLaren fan"
the random stranger said.

evidence as above.

john johnny johnny whoosh

eunice tried.

words.

Haley (in class): You know what? You guys asked me what the point was to all of this, school, literature...life. And I said there was no point. And that's not true. What I should have said was, "I don't know". Because the truth is, not long ago, I sat where you are and wondered exactly the same things. When something that's tragic and evil and unexplainable happend like losing someone forever...I still wonder ...just like you do. Alright, everybody, get out a piece of paper and pen.

Samantha: Why?

Haley: Because this is a literature class. When archaeologists uncoverlost cicilizations and they unearth their worlds that have long been since been destroyed, you know what they find most often? They find stories ...... ancient languages, words, inscriptions from people who have been gone for thousand of years, because chances are, like you, they wanted to know, "Whats the point ?". And they wanted us to know that they were here, you know ? .......... like......... they told their stories, and they tried to make sense of their lives and their worlds and their tragedies. So that's what we are gonna do.

So I want you to write something, anything at all, about Quentin Fields. If you knew him, write a favorite memory. If you didn't know him, write what you think the point is of all this for yourself and your life and your time here. This is a literature class and that's what writers do. We put pen to paper in times of devastating tragedy. And we try and make sense of it. Maybe we will find some clarity in some of those words. Maybe we will find peace.

Haley takes a marker and writes on Quentin's desk: "He who does not weep, does not see."

....

Did you ever wonder what it would be like if you weren't you anymore?

If you were suddenly gone, how would your world react?

Whatever you imagined is wrong. There;s nothing romantic about death. Grief is like the Ocean. It's deep and Dark and bigger than all of us. And pain is like a thief in the night. Quiet. Persistent. Unfair. Diminished by time and faith and love.

....

Haley: Your strength is inspiring.

Denise: My strength is from Jesus Christ. I am going to miss my baby boy for the rest of this life but I know we are going to see him again and our faith will see us through.

...One Tree Hill Season 6 Episode 3 - “Get Cape. Wear Cape. Fly”

even though these aren't from me, but i suppose these are the words i've been looking for all this while. some clarity, some peace, some closure.

and the GPS says Please Recalculate Your Route

it's very simple really.

we just want to be happy.
but that road to happiness???

we are but poor navigators.

fathers

just wanted to share this which touched my heart today.

http://www.dayswithmyfather.com/

花好月圆。

中秋节快乐 ：）

it's a belated 2 for monodelphia too.

life and not.

many things i thought i want to do, like...

1. go for a walk to nowhere in particular. put on a pair of shoes, arm with the camera and just be off. and be pleasantly surprised with where i end up with/at.

2. have a picnic.

3. have a movie marathon

4. find a way to express how i feel.

but come weekend and free time, i get all lazy and all i want to do is to sleep or park myself at home and in front of the computer.

but above all, i wish i could make things the same. i wish i could take away the fear in their hearts. i wish you would know how much you are missed. i wish that time and action can be reversed. and we can choose again, choose again.

there's so many thing we can do and so many things we can't.

每天每天

歌手：方大同 专辑：Soul Boy
曲：方大同 词：娃娃

每天每天 站在忙乱又无聊的路旁 等你向我走来
每天每天 一直看到你和你说话 才算有个开始

每天每天 我都没感觉我们有什么 改变
我一直以为 这是永远 而我无法想像你会离开

我已习惯 你就在我的右手边 一起看无聊的笑片 约好去看地中海的蓝
我已习惯 我们一起像Old friend 分享生活里的一切
我知道你每个笑 有不同的意义存在

明白让你走会后悔(不愿意你离开)这样的感情太可贵(我现在已了解)
我要的幸福 每一天 每一天 慢慢发现
And I love you baby 不会再后退 也不能只做你的 朋友

我已习惯 我们一起像Old friend
分享生活 的一切 我只要在你身边让你明白我的爱

thurs, 8.30am, wa lao

there was once i dreamt that i overslept on a workday. i woke up praying that this will never happen in real life. lo & behold... this morning when i opened my eyes, i was shocked by how bright the room was. the first question i asked myself was, is it the weekend??

thurs, 8.30am, wa lao. nightmare come true.

warming up for work

the favourite part of my work day is in the morning when i get settled down with a nice hot cup of tea/coffee, slowly warming myself up for work.

september

its monday...already?
good day.

샤이니 누난 너무 예뻐 nomu yeppo.

this is an english cover for a cheesy korean song by a group of underaged boys. basically, the title means "Big sister you are so pretty" - just think stacey's mum and you get an idea. but this girl made this one sound so good. if you like corrinne may, olivia, joanna wang... this one's for you.

friday cds nights.

realized that hanging out with the drama peeps on friday nights has become a lifestyle pattern for me and tonight, i crashed the boys' band practice.

besides the recorder, the triangle and the tambourine (ktv at taiwan!), i havent pretty much played any other instruments. so i am super happy pia taught me how to play the bass today. He probably had regretted saying "come, i teach you something brainless", because i sure took awhile to learn. but so happy! thank you!

i hope such friday night meetups continue! be it a big group gathering or just the girls or just the tampines gang!

on weekends.

life definately gets easier when there's something to look forward to, and in today's instance - the weekend!

last saturday was spent at the flea market at homeclub, central & ending it off with fireworks viewing. my very romantic date with ganann - watching the fireworks in the rain. sunday was breakfast with dad and then the rest of the day in front of the tv watching the Olympic Games.

as for this weekend, I've gotten tickets at a discounted price to catch 12 Lotus with my mum. Baybeats is on and i'm keeping my options open about catching My Little Airport there on Sunday.

Meanwhile, I decided to reward myself with...

the much raved about Sodagreen's concert dvd.

so, i'll organize an 'openhouse' to watch this together when i get the dvd. (well, i know there's at least 1 friend who is with me in this, right yieng?)

adios.. enjoy your weekend =)

Beijing Olympics 2008

and today marks the closing of the Beijing Olympics 2008. 17 days of sports entertainment and the moments of glory - the Singapore's Table Tennis Silver, Usain Bolt, Michael Phelps. I was glued to the tv today watching the final matches for Basketball. Personally, I enjoyed the Argentina VS Lithunia basketball match over the fight for gold match between USA & Spain! Perfect way to end off the last day of the games.

Michael "8 Gold" Phelps

Argentina's celebrating their bronze win.

Luis Scola & Andres Nocioni! (I was rooting for them)

Rudy Fernandez (Spain)

chest-thumping Usain Bolt.

.....

ending off with something funny,

"No Foul!" or "Must Protect at All Cost"?

flee in thrift

in anticipation of some good cheap fun.

after dark

The ground we stand on looks solid enough,
but if something happens it can drop right out from under you.
And once that happens, you've had it: things'll never be the same.
All you can do is go on living alone down there in the dark

...

Korogi speaking “‘Memory is so crazy! It’s like we’ve got these drawers crammed with tons of useless stuff. Meanwhile, all the really important things we just keep forgetting, one after the other.’

Korogi stands there holding the remote control.

‘You know what I think?’ She says. ‘That people’s memories are maybe the fuel they burn to stay alive. Whether those memories have any actual importance or not, it doesn’t matter as far as the maintenance of life is concerned. They’re all just fuel. Advertising fillers in the newspaper, philosophy books, dirty pictures in a magazine, a bundle of then-thousand-yet bills: when you feed ‘em to the fire, they’re all just paper. The fire isn’t thinking, ‘Oh, this is Kant,’ or ‘Oh, this is the Yomiuri evening edition,’ or ‘Nice tits,’ while it burns. To the fire, they’re nothing but scraps of paper. It’s the exact same thing. Important memories, not-so-important memories, totally useless memories: there’s no distinction-they’re all just fuel.”

.... Haruki Murakami :: After Dark

choux

chou creme by delfine & eunice.
thank you del for everything.. spanks!

string

all it takes is for a friend to find you, even if the hand reached out was in virtual reality. like even though its lost in sight, the string has never been let go.

"I shot an arrow into the air,
It fell to earth, I knew not where;
For so swiftly it flew, the sight
Could not follow it in its flight.


I breathed a song into the air,
It fell to earth, I knew not where;
For, who has sight so keen and strong
That it can follow the flight of song?


Long, long afterward, in an oak
I found the arrow, still unbroke;
And the song, from beginning to end,
I found again in the heart of a friend."

-- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

The Lord My God

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. (Timothy 1:7)

Perfect love casts out fear (1 John 4:18 )

Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the LORD your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you. (Deuteronomy 31:6)

And the LORD, He is the One who goes before you. He will be with you, He will not leave you nor forsake you; do not fear nor be dismayed (Deuteronomy 31:8)

the beautiful you.

i think about you everyday. in my thoughts, you are always beautiful as how everyone remembers you. and in these memories are the scenes of family gatherings, with the children, gossiping with the aunties, and the food, chinese new year and card playing., your smile and your voice. i remember you everyday and you are beautiful as always and smiling, in these everyday memories.

BALANCE

life is about balance, just like your music list.
...gan ann

my music playlist needs some balance, gmail me your recommended english songs! :)

OS

如果留在记忆的，只有快乐
那该多好。

home innovations.

color by color is the second fixture series at monodelphia.
sine qua none is my favourite out of the first series.

world's best

it has been quite some time since the last time i asked my brother about the prices of mp3 player selling at simlim as i was intending to replace my old cranky one as a present for myself on my 1st payday. i later decided against simlim and to wait for another month when i found out the comex fair is at the end of this month. i was all ready to brave the comex crowd to get it. but when i woke up this morning, i was pleasantly surprised with a new mp3 player hanging right on my door. this santa claus is none other than my brother.

it doesnt matter that its a 2G player, or that he was impatient and grunted when i thanked him, or even if he decides later to demand money back from me - it is still the *world's best mp3 player simply because he remembered.

*world's best is a hyperbole often used by goh binghui.

August

23rd :: flea mkt @ Home Club
28 - 31st :: Comex Fair

music.

my space from tanya records acoustic covers of song from the likes of jack johnson and demos she wrote for other artiste such as karen mok, yang zhong wei. i really love this entire album - the guitar, clean cut singing, claps of simple appreciation. i hope there will come a chance to sing like that too.

条件都已放宽 精采又怎样
爱情的使用量 尽量减半
睡得太晚 梦太频繁
别来烦 帮个忙
独自呢喃 天都快亮
又回想
无尽无尽的夜晚
不打烊的小酒馆
没有人急著回家
没有人想各自回家
无尽无尽的夜晚
爱在舌尖上打转
测试他对我有 多疯狂
原来只是精神上
对爱渴望 那么向往 那么困难

till reunion

im sorry even the adults have no answer for you.

dear _ ,
i noticed that while you were crying, you screamed why. why?? even as i watched our uncles smoking, cursing - face wrinkled in pain, they too asked why. i don't understand, he said. why??

why did you leave us this way?

Till better days

In a car outside, we stalk the idle kind.
If you're leaving, just let me know.
Tobacco and peppermint, dusting for fingerprints.
A film in her eyes from the glow.

Some rules are made with all intentions to break
And she defends it with a warped rationale.
And I've seen what happens to the wicked and proud
When they decide to try to take on the throne for the crown.

And we learn as we age.
We've learned nothing and my body still aches.
And you take cause they give.
Though I love you and my body it leaks like a sieve.

When it got old outside, smoke beneath the playground lights.
If you're coming home, just let me know.
Sucking on your breath mint, dissected and stuck with pins.
A film in her eyes from the glow.

Concrete and water, she's looking for her daughter
At midnight in torrential downpour.
And everything I said about how messed your head is,
Was cut up and left in bits and pieces on the cutting room floor.

Take the picture from the wall when you think that nothing matters.
Take the picture from the plane and it's a long ways to the floor.
Cut your finger on the edge cause it's sharper than they told you.
Take a leap from out the window cause it's way too far to go through the door

"Jaw Theme Swimming" by Brand New

jaa.

till better days

缺氧

我不喜欢拥挤的人潮,
觉得要配合别人的脚步，
顾及他人心情，
又要拿捏好自己的情绪，
是一件很累人的事。

-

being nice doesn't pay nor give you character does it.

是誰說彩虹不能長頭上

一隻鯨魚 要怎麼放進冰箱 打開門 然後用力關冰箱
然後呢 如果你還想要 放一隻大象
一份希望 要怎麼放進心臟 如果你 活的有一點悲傷
答案是 用力丟掉鯨魚 用力甩悲傷

是誰說半夜不能吃便當 是誰說彩虹不能長頭上
是誰說藍色就等於憂傷 你看看天空和海洋...

this is a Stay Real collaboration With 7-11.

Open-Chan is 3!

semi something

i am in the midst of a semi something. something but not yet something. semi job. semi comfort. semi stability. semi something.

and with it comes semi worry, semi happiness, semi satisfaction, semi indulgence, semi hunt.

semi something

hiroki

complete, are we not?

taken in 2004.

fall in, all you female mafia.

here in singapore, we meet again.

little moments

have you ever caught yourself in a moment whereby you think to yourself "i like the way that i am feeling"

i feel that when i catch myself...
laughing when reading my manga;
singing;
drumming my feet or fingers to the rhythm of my music;
feeling inspired, enlightened;
taking a nice picture;
having a new idea;
watched a good show;
reminiscing fond memories;
thinking about random people;
imagining...

its the feeling of feeling happy being happy.

its not that i dont feel happy when i'm with others, but when u realize that you are happy even when spending time with yourself.. you feel that you are truly in peace and at ease with yourself and your life in general.

july

15th July (Tues) - manda's convo
19th July (Sat) - desserts party
27th July (Sunday) - family picture

commencement

my parents and grandma who sat through a 4 hour long ceremony, even though they don't understand much of what is said on said. jostled with the crowd to take pictures for/with me. the excitement in their voices, the smile on their faces that hinted of their pride. everything, just for me.

friends who cared enough to stick around, bake us a beautiful cake. you people on my left and right, not during the ceremony, but people who surround me and built me a wall of support.

no amount of paper nor qualification can touch nor shape your life nor hold as much value without them.

and last but not least, happy birthday jan! saranghae chingu!

congratulations and celebrations

congratulations to maggie, del and yieng on your graduation day!
and also to jan on your job!

may happiness and money be bestowed on you all... hahaha..

百万大歌星

yongbin, maggie, jfeng... remember this???

百万大歌星 is our absolutely 'favouritest' show (at least it my impression, it was!) even with so many channels on the taiwan tv network, we will definitely watch this if its on.

the nature of this gameshow is that the artiste contender will sing along to a song first with music and lyrics accompaniment. a few lines later, the music stops and the lyrics prompter goes off and the contender is supposed to complete the next line in the song.

watching the show is like having our own ktv & games time as we all guessed along with the contender. super fun! i miss those times & the show. now that i found it online, one more variety show added to my "online watch list"!

Here's a simple one, which we all guess correctly...

过去让它过去
来不及
从头喜欢你
白云缠绕着蓝天
如果 不能够永远走在一起
xxxxxx xxxxx xxxxx xxxxx xxx xxx
。。。。心动-林晓培

27 words. Fill in the x's! No prize for getting it right, all i can say is.. YOU ARE IN OUR LEAGUE!

23:56 - man, now i can't bear to sleep cause im watching it... the addiction all over again. deja vu!
xiao jing teng's - http://www.tudou.com/programs/view/sLFgL2yoEq0/
http://www.tudou.com/programs/view/lzDGHx-pkZ8/

i am weak but he is strong

it has been a great weekend - energized and recharged from the good food, good company and an interesting service. went for the hokkien service on sunday with yb's mum and it was really different to hear preaching in another tonggue. in my mind, hokkien words were furiously being translated into english simultaneously. and when i have that scrunched up look of not understanding, yb's mom will explain to me in chinese. and singing "Jesus Loves Me This I Know" in hokkien, makes it seems like familiar yet new song which touched my heart anew.

over dinner last night, jfeng filled me in on the awards happenings. congratulations Gary for the well deserved win!

Gary Cao Ge, nominated for Best Male Mandarin Artist (Popular Music) for thesecond time, was selected as the recipient of the prestigious honor for the 19th Golden Melody Awards.

Newly "crowned" Best Male Mandarin Artist (Popular Music) Gary Cao received the award from the hands of Eason Chan YiXun, who had also been nominated for Best Male Mandarin Artist. In his acceptance speech, he thanked all of his supporting fans, his friends, and his family. He especially thanked his girlfriend for clearing up the rumors and speculations that he was,in fact, gay

.

yesyes, he's the man!! other deserving artistes includes Tanya (Best Female and Best Producer), SodaGreen (Best band) and Karen Mok (Best Album). I was rolling my eyes internally at jay chou's and fang wen shan's win at Qing Hua Ci (best song??) and of cos stupid jo-cannot-speak-english-lin and the rumour she is with Peng Yu Yan. NOOBLOODYWAY! pardon the media bitch in me talking. ok, have a great week all!

p/s: i just did a boo-boo. a phonecall came in and instinctively i picked up and happily went "good morning Fed.." then i caught my tongue and heard the "SHIT" running through my head. hahahhaa. talk about habit.

neverland

让我们谈一个不见面的恋爱
任凭想象，多了点自由和美满
每晚复习着一个背熟的脸庞
听他说出那没声音的对白

让我们谈个不承诺的恋爱
没了誓言，多了点今天和此刻的迷恋
当我需要你的时候你会出现
在我脑海发挥创意的那个空间

让我们谈一个不普通的恋爱
让我们谈一个不存在的恋爱
让我们谈一个不背叛的恋爱
让我们谈一个不厌倦的恋爱

让我们谈一个不朽的恋爱。

on food, music and travel

tried and tested!
Kim Dae Mun at Le Meridien Hotel - cheap and good korean food.

a good spicy korean fare always gives a warm, fuzzy, ahhhhhh feeling. just like the ramyun i had at Phnom Penh and the stew at Taipei 101. ahhhhhhhhhhhhh..............

on another note, this morning as I was getting ready to go out - blowdrying my hair with my radio switched on.... Olivia Ong's Close to You started playing. What coincidence and it was on 9.33fm a chinese radio station no less. That song is my morning alarm, which woke us up for the 12 days we spent in taiwan. listening to it every morning whenever the alarm rings still brings back memory of Taiwan even though there's also a big part of me groaning at the need to wake up at 6.30am to get to work.

Listening to Olivia ong's 'Close to you' (kope from eunice handphone) and it reminded me of the alarm we had in Taiwan. First night in Taiwanmex, we had to wake up 5 am in the morning, and this was the first song i heard. From than on, it kept coming back into my head in the mornings to come.
....yongbin

i suppose that's the beauty of our 5 senses - capturing memories and bringing a sense of familiarity and nostalgia in sights, taste, sounds, smell and touch.

TGIF

Thank God It's Fridayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!

agenda: sleep, getwell, pig out, hangout.

refuge!

excused myself from work an hour earlier to escape home and sleep off my throbbing head and feverish body.

the thing about working is that it makes u cherish home time and the time spent hanging out with friends more. but the weekends seem too short especially when commencement is coming up. its a tedious affair - collect gown, the ceremony itself, photoshoot. the only picture is my mind now is me hidden among the many other graduates. DEGREE SO WHAT?

let me escape back to my duvet.

i

my ignorance has made you perfect.

Anata no ouchi wa dokodesuka?

Japanese Nursery Rhyme

Maigo no
Maigo no
Koneko-chan
Anata no ouchi wa dokodesuka?
Ouchi o kitemo wakaranai
Namae o kite wakaranai
Meow meow meow meow
Meow meow meow meow
Naite bakari iru koneko-chan
Inu-no omawari-san
Konatte shimatte
Woof woof woof woof
Woof woof woof woof

a kitten was lost. it didn't know where her home was nor remembered its name. then it met a police dog but alas, he was lost too.

lost, arent we all?

rested

4 rounds of ice-cream in 2 days....ahhhhhhhh, happiness =)

how's first week of work?

hello hello! it's the weekend, and not having to wake up at 630am is pure bliss.

the first week of work felt like i was thrown into the deep end of the pool when i only know how to tread water. work was really intense as my fellow colleague in the department was on emergency leave for 3.5 days so i had to assume much responsibility where screwups involved money and stockouts (which is like the corporate highway to hell) it's mentally draining to be on high alert mode.

corporate responsibilities aside, there is a generally contentment you feel after the end of such a week to realize you didnt drown or screwup too much. (i should really stop forgetting to attach files in my email) for me the work environment is really important, so i really like the company's open door policy and it helped greatly that i get along well with my boss and colleagues.

working with a female boss made me realize once again how it is not easy for a woman to manage both career and family. its really beyond my understanding how you can maintain a family when you get to work in the morning and knock off late at night. it makes me wonder should i respect them? to have both a career and a family... is that a good thing? or not?

i suppose it all boils down again to "you win some you lose some". and everyday, we fight to seek a balance. between work and play. passion and money. heart and mind. emotions and logic.

alright, that should be the last bit of work talk. off to enjoy the weekend!

just for u 2 la but no more pls!

(01) Wad time is it now?
10.07pm

(02) Where will you go if someone sponsors you a tour ticket?*
Europe of course!

(03) What's your favourite thing(s) to do?*
eat, sleep, travel, tv

(04) Do you think money can buy happiness?*
money can buy some form of happiness but not all happiness

(05) If you can have 1 dream to come true, what would it be?*
Be happy.

(06) Do you believe you can survive without money?*
unless eating air can keep me full.

(07) Do you encourage girls to admit their love to guys?*
personally, no.

(08) What do you dream of doing in the future?*
have my own business. shop/hostel/hotel?

(09)List out 3 good points about the person who tagged you.*
maggie: funny, dependable, my shopping partner in taiwan!
aye: courageous, dependable, willing to travel with me in future. haha

(10)Are you happy now?*
i am not unhappy.

(11) What makes you happy?*
happy food, happy people, music, tv and general contentment with life

(12) What type of person do you hate the most?*
disrespectful

(13) Where do you see yourself 1o years down the road?*
no crystal glass here, anywhere as long as its happy where i am.

(14) If You Do Not Have A Boyfriend/Girlfriend, Do You Feel Like Having One Now?*
give me my knighto!!! (unless u watch zettai kareshi u wont get it)

(15) Who is the most important person in your life?*
mum.

(16) What do you think is the most important thing in your life?*
Being happy

(17) Do you have a crush on someone now? Who is it?
-

(18) The love of your life now?*
-

(19) Are you courageous enough to tell a person that you like him/her?*
no

(20) Would you rather follow your heart or mind when deciding for the right one*
i'd say mind but we never know!

survival of the fittest

stealing some time to do a post now, i foresee that only short random updates will be possible from now on since...
(1) work here is rather intense so i dont get much slack time
(2) nobody is interested in reading an account of what i did on excel
(3) i will be too tired by the time i get home

for those who are concerned and have been giving me advice and encouragements, im doing good so far. to me, its really takes a huge load of my mind now that i accepted this 3 months job because focusing on work distracts me from worrying about all the jobhunt drama. im trying to put my best foot forward in this because i do cherish this opportunity given and its does more good to be giving things your best shot and to learn something than to work half-heartedly. the knowledge that im earning some dough while im at it helps alot too. the day i made my decision about taking up this job, I saw this liner in the papers that said "Pragmatism Rules". I guess that's a sign.

p.s: communicate with me in ulu bukit merah via the comments link or good ol' email instead of using the fobble chatbox. security in ulu bukit merah blocks my blog & gmail chatbox from access. needless to say... so is MSN.

ichi

gambattemasu!! yosh!

take flight

clinging on a lifeline.

a door closed, and another open. instead of waiting for other doors to open, i chose to go through this one opened door and hope that other doors open from hereon. with it comes a future that nobody knows except He who is in charge. So, well don't think. trust and hold on tight....

comfort in choux a la creme

put life in God's hands
and living in yours.


把生命交给上帝
把生活交给自己。

loss time life

THANK YOU GOD!

出頭天

出頭天 /五月天

在我的天頂 甘有人會看見 看到我不甘願這樣過一生

在我的一生 我甘願來相信 每一朵花都有自己的春天


在我的天頂 大雨落不停 也不能改變到我的固執


永遠等待 那一日 咱可以出頭天 人生不怕風浪 只怕自己沒志氣

那一日 咱可以出頭天 我盼望的日子 會真快 來到我身邊


在我的天頂 甘有人在保佑 怎樣我常常摔的頭殼流血

血乾會結痂 失敗也不失志 成功是咱自己看自己得起


飄浪的日子 等待著時機 我不信命運會這麼無情


永遠等待 那一日 咱可以出頭天 人生不怕風浪 只怕自己沒志氣

那一日 咱可以出頭天 我盼望的日子 會真快 來到我身邊

listen here & chin up!

on the 12th day of taiwan, my true love sent to me

(1st June ) - Taipei >> Singapore

Goodbye.

on the 11th day of taiwan, my true love sent to me...

(31st May) - Taipei >> Xi Men Ding 西门町

@ ximending with yiting, think she has assimilated so well with us such that the local thinks she's singaporean too.

无敌铁金刚！students' fundraising performance

promo for a horror film

we went back early to celebrate weicheng's bday...

our family in taiwan.
*Note the "21" on the bday cake.

last night in taiwan. taken from the balcony.